There is something forced and arbitrary about celebrating New Year’s Eve that I’ve sometimes bristled against. Some of this surely  is based on the fact that I worked it for many years, serving food and drinks to people often desperate to have a good time. It is not a celebration that always brings out the best behavior in people! But as several years have passed since I have worked this holiday, I realize it is a good time of year to pause for both reflection and dreaming.

2015 has been full of adventure, routine, family, travel, writing, new friends, mourning, contemplation, and love. I have realized some big goals for myself and have fallen short on others. There have been such fun and loving times intertwined with sorrow and loss. Today my family is healthy and happy, a fact that I do not take for granted.

I feel grateful for it all and have a new sense of awareness of what I can and cannot control. So in 2016 I’d like to focus on the small things, things that know I can do that increase beauty or love. Things like buying fresh flowers for my home, memorizing poetry, looking people in the eye when I talk to them, saying yes more, and showing up. Maybe they seem insignificant in the big picture, but it feels to me that the big things are informed by and conscious of these little moments. There is so much to look forward to in 2016, I look to the future and smile. And I hope I can smile with you sometime this year.